Getting to Gratitude

While celebrating Thanksgiving we are reminded to be grateful and appreciative. Reminding ourselves is useful because it seems gratitude is an elusive state of being. Cultivating more of it would be hugely beneficial. Imagine what it would it be like to be consistently grateful? What would be possible?


Being grateful and appreciative feels wonderful. It’s joyful and uplifts the spirit. We feel generous and able to share. It’s empowering, gives us confidence and the ability to take on new challenges. Not only does it feel great, it gives the whole immune system a boost. When we feel good our energy radiates, positively impacting others. With these benefits it makes sense to access gratitude more often. What keeps us from doing so?

‘Well that’s obvious,’ you might be thinking, ‘there’s so much going on in my life, how could I possibly feel grateful all the time? I’m far too busy, feeling overwhelmed, frustrated about what’s not working, and worrying about what needs to be done.” Judgment and criticism may be more constant ways of being. Energetically, these feelings are stressful, heavy and difficult.

Fundamentally, it’s a choice whether you feel gratitude or find yourself grumbling and pushing hard, but it’s easier said than done. If making the choice was as easy as flipping a switch, most likely you would. The difficultly lies in habitual thinking and feeling patterns; the more we think and feel in certain ways the harder it is to change. These patterns, like ruts in the road get deeper the more they are used.

The choice we need to make is much more than an intellectual decision; it’s a deep, internal commitment. Like the air we breathe, our habitual thoughts, feelings and behaviours are invisible to us. That is, until we take the approach of observing ourselves and becoming aware of our thinking habits and their associated feelings. Then we can make new conscious choices.

One of my habits has been to worry and be concerned about having enough money. Growing up we always had enough. My parents were careful, worked hard and made practical choices. I learned to be frugal with money. Even though we enjoyed what many couldn’t, it seemed whenever I asked for some little extra thing I heard, ‘We can’t afford it.’

Attempts to change my relationship with money have been challenging. It’s hard to break out of old patterns. Especially with money, it all seems so black and white, so finite. In my experience when there’s a fixed amount coming in, outflow needs to be controlled so it can all work out. The problem is, there are often unforeseen expenses which I seem to have no control over.

Years ago, I was expressing concerns about making ends meet, and my daughter, who was about 12 at the time said, “Don’t worry Mom. There’s always enough.” She caught me off guard, because she was right. We always had a place to live, and there was always something to eat. I chose to trust my ability to consistently earn the specific amount required to cover expenses each month – and I did.

Now its time to update my beliefs. Instead of being limited to consistent income and having fears about its decline, I’d like to be grateful for what I have and put my focus on increasing income. Trusting the inbound flow and being grateful for it opens up to a much higher likelihood of recognizing opportunities to have more. Worrying about not having enough reinforces limitation and shuts off the flow.

What if income wasn’t finite and came from unforeseen sources. That would be a different experience. As I ponder this I allow all the old beliefs and feelings of worry and concern to surface and as they do I, resolve them. Releasing internal conflict allows me to access the feelings of having enough, even having more than enough.

From this place I can also choose to be grateful for all the talents and resources I have to share. This feels much more empowering. What if, I simply believed in my own abilities in the same way I believe in others?

Making the shift from grumbling to gratitude has huge benefits for us. The law of attraction states that we attract to us the energy we send out. So if we are exuding the grumbling, closed down energy of limitation and not enough, that is what we are likely to attract more of. If we send out positive vibrant energy others perceive it and want some of that energy for themselves. When we exude the energy of gratitude we attract the same kind of energy back to us opening up whole new possibilities and opportunities.

What would you rather do? Open up exciting new possibilities or attract more difficult challenges?