Stop Politics and Back-Stabbing at Work

A recent comment stated; "There are days when I hear my friends' stories of corporate politics and back-stabbing.... I wonder... why do people have to play that way?"

Have you encountered conflict, politics and back-stabbing, in your business or workplace?
Continuing our theme on Effective Meetings, we explore this common occurance and share solutions.

What's Wrong with Politics?
For our purposes let's define politics as the act of being committed to and going for a goal. The potential for conflict arises when people are pursuing different goals, such as: a different vision and strategy for where the company or group should be headed; different goals competing for the same resources. Or when people are competing for promotions, money and recognition within or outside of the organization.

Having diverse viewpoints is only natural, so why does 'politics' get labelled as bad? This stems predominantly from the level of attachment to perspectives or agendas and because many of us are poor communicators. Those with dominating personality styles tend to communicate their ideas forcefully and those who are more reserved sit back and listen and share their points of view cautiously.
Problems typically arise when a couple of dominant people in a meeting have opposing goals and charged emotions. They may also have poor communication skills and are not really hearing what the other person has to say and speaking before others have finished speaking. (You probably have other examples to add). We see and hear the behaviour of the speakers, but we don't know what emotional buttons are being pushed on the inside, in both the dominant speakers and the more reserved people. Now we have conflict in the room.

How Effective Are Your Meetings?
Take our Meeting Survey and find out.

Characters in the example above are exhibiting behaviours from points #5 and #10 in the Effective Meeting Survey.
#5 One or two members dominate the meeting.
#10 People start to disagree with others before they really understand what's being said.

At this point there are likely a whole variety of emotional reactions taking place. The speakers may have become frustrated and angry in their heated debate. If they are passionate about their opposing goals they are likely trying to force an outcome and are ignoring each other's perspectives. Others in the room may be feeling anxiety with the tone of the conversation, which causes them to shut down and withhold their perspectives for fear of being rejected. It is safer not to enter into the turmoil and to keep quiet. The meeting continues and often no clear outcome is achieved. At best the topic is tabled for further research and discussion.

How Can You Stop Back-Stabbing?
Our scenario sets up a ripe field for the negative aspects of 'politics' as identified in the meeting effectiveness survey:

#11 Following meetings, post-mortems are held behind closed doors about what really went on.
#18 There is seldom any checking to see whether the group has gone off track, or if the meeting was an effective use of time.

Let's consider for a moment what the range of emotions might be among the group. One of the speakers might be feeling some triumph and eagerness, others frustration and exasperation and still others relief that the uneasiness and tension within the meeting is over.

Where is the post-mortem of the meeting held? Likely the meeting review is conducted in the hallways, the bathroom and at coffee. This is where the real conversation takes place. Opponents start to line up their supporters for the next round and say less than impeccable things about the other speaker and their goal. This can spiral into a contagious negative environment that no one really wants to be a part of, but can't figure out why it exists. As stated in a recent comment I came across; "There are days when I hear my friends' stories of corporate politics and back-stabbing.... I wonder... why do people have to play that way?"

Change  The Game
There are a couple of ways to change the game. They include improving meeting structure and changing your personal game.

Tips for Improving Meeting Structure
1. Determine a clear objective for the meeting?
2. As the chair learn to manage the group's communication more effectively?
3. At the end of every meeting do a check in to find out what went well and what could be improved.
4. Create space for everyone to speak their truth.

Shifting how you Manage Yourself
Many of my clients have left the corporate world, because of the conflicted environments they worked in. Some even experienced stress related health problems. They soon realize though, opting to start their own business requires excellent communication and relationship building skills. We often focus on strategies for respectuful communication and increased positivity in relationships.
· Be quiet: listen to other's ideas completely before speaking.
· Ask questions to gain further insight
· Take time out when emotionally upset,
later share only your own feelings without blaming or judging
· Be impeccable: decline listening to gossip
· Speaking positively about others, validate their strenghs.

Some of the Hot Buttons we remove are:
· The need to be right
· Ignoring other people's perspectives
· Fear of not being accepted.
· Being judgemental of others.

Sign up for the next Emotional Hot Button Removal Workshop

You can read my colleague Jacque's Post-Corporate story at:
http://workeasy4lifebalance.com/rel/back-stabbing-at-work

Changing the negative aspects of politics in any work place requires the willingness to communicate positively and effectively, impeccability and being someone who appreciates and validates others.


Wishing you engaging, collaborative, synergistic meetings, and a healthy back!

Lynne Brisdon, PCC
Living In Vision Enterprises Inc.