This time of year always seems like endarkenment to me. As the days get shorter, the weather gloomier, it feels like an emotionally down season. Unresolved material gets stirred up from the past like the ghosts and skeletons of Halloween.
Perhaps there’s some wisdom in the Indian celebration of light – Diwali which celebrates the casting out of demons by lighting lanterns. What if we took that approach to casting out old emotional demons and celebrating a new lightness of being?
Or, for those of you following the planetary ascension progression of triple date portals this month, 11:11:11 is an invitation to set intention for enlightenment. As the world becomes darker each day we can choose to raise our inner frequency, to shine our inner radiance and light up the world around us.
There will always be darkness and light. Where do you want to put your focus? It’s all about intent. There may be more darkness in some areas of our lives than others. Like sweeping the proverbial dirt under the rug, we may choose to keep ourselves in the dark about the very things we want to change. Working with people as a healer and a coach it’s interesting to notice how we would rather hang on to our pain, or negative stories than change or let them go.
What is it that keeps us from letting go of old ways of being? Usually the biggest barrier is being afraid to look inside. We continue along blithely accepting we are the way we are, unwilling to look under the surface for fear of what we may find out. We imagine what’s going on inside will be even worse than what we’re currently experiencing. Like the ghosts and goblins we imagined under our bed as kids; it could be scary, emotionally overwhelming or traumatic to look inside.
We are deeply conditioned to avoid pain and trauma. The irony is that quite often our fear of facing what we don’t want to feel is more painful than experiencing the energy of the actual event. When we allow ourselves to feel the energy of an emotion and move through and beyond the emotional experience, it’s quite painless. We can move energy with virtually no emotional trauma, unlike traditional counselling therapies where releasing can be very traumatic; lots of crying, major catharsis, etc. Recipients may feel much better afterward, but can be emotionally drained by the process and often only a small amount of emotional energy has been released.
On a more subtle level, we may be deeply identified with our own behavioural patterns. We are so used to being a certain way it feels normal. For example we may have been depressed for so long we don’t know what it feels like not to be. Or we may have felt anxious or overly stressed to the point that we can no longer recollect what calm feels like.
We start to accept these states as being “normal.” We may become adept in our avoidance; choosing to focus on the parts that are working and ignoring the parts that aren’t. Or we may have become a victim, knowing that life could be or should be better and being disappointed by what is not happening. It may seem like we have our nose up against a brick wall – not knowing which way to turn, or how to look over the wall. We feel stuck and struggle in a life that feels like a never ending Halloween horror show.
Another reason we resist looking inside is most of us have had the experience of wanting to hide some part of ourselves from others. We talk about the skeletons in our closet or our demons. We feel that these parts of ourselves are suspect, we feel like we are not good enough. We fear what will happen if we expose those parts of ourselves; that we will be judged, ostracized or shut out in some way. We may feel a sense of being punished, hurt or that love will be withheld.
So we try to keep them hidden, but they jump out regardless. Others see them whether we want them to or not, they show up in our everyday behaviour. For example when we try to be confident when we're not, people notice, even though they may not say anything to us.
What would happen if we had the courage to step away from the story of who we are and let go of the image we attempt to hold up?
It is only by exposing our demons to the light and accepting them that we can truly let them go. With acceptance we can move to resolution and completion by fully feeling our present and past emotional experiences. Then there is nothing left to hide.
Imagine boosting yourself up to look over the wall and finding paradise rather than the boogie man. What would it take to look over the wall that is standing between you and paradise?
Learn techniques to resolve and complete past emotional experience in Emotional Hot Button Removal Training.
Lynne Brisdon
Professional Certified Coach
http://www.livinginvision.com/
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Friday, October 7, 2011
Getting to Gratitude
While celebrating Thanksgiving we are reminded to be grateful and appreciative. Reminding ourselves is useful because it seems gratitude is an elusive state of being. Cultivating more of it would be hugely beneficial. Imagine what it would it be like to be consistently grateful? What would be possible?
Being grateful and appreciative feels wonderful. It’s joyful and uplifts the spirit. We feel generous and able to share. It’s empowering, gives us confidence and the ability to take on new challenges. Not only does it feel great, it gives the whole immune system a boost. When we feel good our energy radiates, positively impacting others. With these benefits it makes sense to access gratitude more often. What keeps us from doing so?
‘Well that’s obvious,’ you might be thinking, ‘there’s so much going on in my life, how could I possibly feel grateful all the time? I’m far too busy, feeling overwhelmed, frustrated about what’s not working, and worrying about what needs to be done.” Judgment and criticism may be more constant ways of being. Energetically, these feelings are stressful, heavy and difficult.
Fundamentally, it’s a choice whether you feel gratitude or find yourself grumbling and pushing hard, but it’s easier said than done. If making the choice was as easy as flipping a switch, most likely you would. The difficultly lies in habitual thinking and feeling patterns; the more we think and feel in certain ways the harder it is to change. These patterns, like ruts in the road get deeper the more they are used.
The choice we need to make is much more than an intellectual decision; it’s a deep, internal commitment. Like the air we breathe, our habitual thoughts, feelings and behaviours are invisible to us. That is, until we take the approach of observing ourselves and becoming aware of our thinking habits and their associated feelings. Then we can make new conscious choices.
One of my habits has been to worry and be concerned about having enough money. Growing up we always had enough. My parents were careful, worked hard and made practical choices. I learned to be frugal with money. Even though we enjoyed what many couldn’t, it seemed whenever I asked for some little extra thing I heard, ‘We can’t afford it.’
Attempts to change my relationship with money have been challenging. It’s hard to break out of old patterns. Especially with money, it all seems so black and white, so finite. In my experience when there’s a fixed amount coming in, outflow needs to be controlled so it can all work out. The problem is, there are often unforeseen expenses which I seem to have no control over.
Years ago, I was expressing concerns about making ends meet, and my daughter, who was about 12 at the time said, “Don’t worry Mom. There’s always enough.” She caught me off guard, because she was right. We always had a place to live, and there was always something to eat. I chose to trust my ability to consistently earn the specific amount required to cover expenses each month – and I did.
Now its time to update my beliefs. Instead of being limited to consistent income and having fears about its decline, I’d like to be grateful for what I have and put my focus on increasing income. Trusting the inbound flow and being grateful for it opens up to a much higher likelihood of recognizing opportunities to have more. Worrying about not having enough reinforces limitation and shuts off the flow.
What if income wasn’t finite and came from unforeseen sources. That would be a different experience. As I ponder this I allow all the old beliefs and feelings of worry and concern to surface and as they do I, resolve them. Releasing internal conflict allows me to access the feelings of having enough, even having more than enough.
From this place I can also choose to be grateful for all the talents and resources I have to share. This feels much more empowering. What if, I simply believed in my own abilities in the same way I believe in others?
Making the shift from grumbling to gratitude has huge benefits for us. The law of attraction states that we attract to us the energy we send out. So if we are exuding the grumbling, closed down energy of limitation and not enough, that is what we are likely to attract more of. If we send out positive vibrant energy others perceive it and want some of that energy for themselves. When we exude the energy of gratitude we attract the same kind of energy back to us opening up whole new possibilities and opportunities.
What would you rather do? Open up exciting new possibilities or attract more difficult challenges?
Being grateful and appreciative feels wonderful. It’s joyful and uplifts the spirit. We feel generous and able to share. It’s empowering, gives us confidence and the ability to take on new challenges. Not only does it feel great, it gives the whole immune system a boost. When we feel good our energy radiates, positively impacting others. With these benefits it makes sense to access gratitude more often. What keeps us from doing so?
‘Well that’s obvious,’ you might be thinking, ‘there’s so much going on in my life, how could I possibly feel grateful all the time? I’m far too busy, feeling overwhelmed, frustrated about what’s not working, and worrying about what needs to be done.” Judgment and criticism may be more constant ways of being. Energetically, these feelings are stressful, heavy and difficult.
Fundamentally, it’s a choice whether you feel gratitude or find yourself grumbling and pushing hard, but it’s easier said than done. If making the choice was as easy as flipping a switch, most likely you would. The difficultly lies in habitual thinking and feeling patterns; the more we think and feel in certain ways the harder it is to change. These patterns, like ruts in the road get deeper the more they are used.
The choice we need to make is much more than an intellectual decision; it’s a deep, internal commitment. Like the air we breathe, our habitual thoughts, feelings and behaviours are invisible to us. That is, until we take the approach of observing ourselves and becoming aware of our thinking habits and their associated feelings. Then we can make new conscious choices.
One of my habits has been to worry and be concerned about having enough money. Growing up we always had enough. My parents were careful, worked hard and made practical choices. I learned to be frugal with money. Even though we enjoyed what many couldn’t, it seemed whenever I asked for some little extra thing I heard, ‘We can’t afford it.’
Attempts to change my relationship with money have been challenging. It’s hard to break out of old patterns. Especially with money, it all seems so black and white, so finite. In my experience when there’s a fixed amount coming in, outflow needs to be controlled so it can all work out. The problem is, there are often unforeseen expenses which I seem to have no control over.
Years ago, I was expressing concerns about making ends meet, and my daughter, who was about 12 at the time said, “Don’t worry Mom. There’s always enough.” She caught me off guard, because she was right. We always had a place to live, and there was always something to eat. I chose to trust my ability to consistently earn the specific amount required to cover expenses each month – and I did.
Now its time to update my beliefs. Instead of being limited to consistent income and having fears about its decline, I’d like to be grateful for what I have and put my focus on increasing income. Trusting the inbound flow and being grateful for it opens up to a much higher likelihood of recognizing opportunities to have more. Worrying about not having enough reinforces limitation and shuts off the flow.
What if income wasn’t finite and came from unforeseen sources. That would be a different experience. As I ponder this I allow all the old beliefs and feelings of worry and concern to surface and as they do I, resolve them. Releasing internal conflict allows me to access the feelings of having enough, even having more than enough.
From this place I can also choose to be grateful for all the talents and resources I have to share. This feels much more empowering. What if, I simply believed in my own abilities in the same way I believe in others?
Making the shift from grumbling to gratitude has huge benefits for us. The law of attraction states that we attract to us the energy we send out. So if we are exuding the grumbling, closed down energy of limitation and not enough, that is what we are likely to attract more of. If we send out positive vibrant energy others perceive it and want some of that energy for themselves. When we exude the energy of gratitude we attract the same kind of energy back to us opening up whole new possibilities and opportunities.
What would you rather do? Open up exciting new possibilities or attract more difficult challenges?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
